Time to start saving...

So I won't be posting any hauls for a LONG while. We have an Xbox, Christmas and other things we need to save for/pay off. So, for the next 6 months or so, my posts will be dedicated to reviewing products I already have, makeup/nail tutorials, and anything fitness related. 

Be on the lookout for the following tutorials:

Nails:
Tiffany and Co. Nails
Cortana Nails
Bella Gema Nails inspired nails (It's based on a shirt she was wearing--the colors were AMAZING)
Haloween cat & skull nails

Makeup:
Bella Gema Nails (based off the same top for the nails)
Cortana inspired look
Elegant fall look
Husband does my makeup!
3 minute makeup challenge!

I'll start filming these this weekend!

If you have any tutorials you'd like to see, let me know!

Link up!!! SkinnyMeg Workout Wednesday - Feeling like a failure...

It's link up time! Workout Wednesday with SkinnyMeg!

Check out Skinny Meg's Blog! 

So this is supposed to be a kick ass super motivating blog post! YAY!

Nope. Not gonna lie. I've fallen off the bandwagon. BIG time. I'm hoping that blogging more about it, and linking up will help keep me motivated and help keep me accountable for my actions. I haven't gained a whole lot of weight, just a few pounds, so it hasn't been completely out of control.

I recently went to a seminar about Excellent Customer Service. One of the things we talked about was setting goals. When it comes to setting goals, there are a few things you need to do in order to be successful in achieving your goals. (Maybe everyone already knows this, but it was insightful to ME)

1. Write your goals down. Ok. So I'm DECENT at this. Not the best. I think my problem is, I write/type them, but don't have them in a place that I can SEE them everyday. So I'm thinking that I should write/type out my goals, and then write them on the big 'ol mirror in my bedroom. I've started to pick up on my blogging, so there's no reason why I can't pick up on my goals. :)

2. Set a time to have the goal completed!!!! THIS!!!!! This is something I don't really... do. And I should. This is another thing I feel could help with accountability. If I meet my "deadline", I'll reward myself--not with FOOD, but with a beauty/fashion/gaming item!

In lieu of this seminar and the valuable information I took from it, I'm making a list of goals for everyone to see, and I will be transferring these to the mirror I look into errrrryday. (I'm so vaaaaain.)

- Lose 15 lbs by December 31st. While this seems COMPLETELY obtainable, I want to be SAFE and obviously, getting my butt to the gym is challenging, so I think it's challenging-ly obtainable. Don't know if that's even a word. Don't care.

-Come up with a daily body section work out (leg day, arm day, back day, etc) by September 30th. I wanted to give myself enough time to REALLY research some moves that would work with the equipment I have access to, as well as what was safe for me as a newbie (again---*sigh*)

- Starting September 16th, I will ride my bike to and from work.

- Starting September 16th, I will incorporate a morning and evening routine for myself and my family. As well as a routine for the weekends.

I'm starting with these. And I'm stickin' to it.

The point is, I'm human. We're all human. We have ups, downs, sideways and backwards times. I've made some mistakes, but I learn from those mistakes and I make better decisions as I go. I've learned from the mistakes I've make before, and in doing so, has lead me to make better decisions. Because I've that, I'm not back up to 198 like I was when I started. I honestly don't know my weight, but I'm not concerned with the number right now. I'm more concerned with how I feel. Emotionally and physically.

Anyone else struggling like I am? Let's keep each other motivated!!!

To sweaty awesomeness and lean mean healthy bods!!! Let's guzzle some water! :D

Until next time!

Review - Gelish VitaGel in Recovery

If you haven't seen my video review on this {which you should if you've subscribed to my YouTube channel *hint hint* *nudge nudge*} check it out here: (Demo video is listed below)

I originally saw a video on the "Strength" version of the VitaGel on JapanNailsandMore's YouTube channel. I was a bit hesitant at first, as I don't have good luck with nails strengtheners. But then I saw that Gelish came out with a Recovery formula specially designed for weak nails, I decided to give it a shot.

As mentioned in my video, a lot of people on Amazon said that the product would just peel off their nails in complete chunks. Or something along those lines. I can assure you that has NOT been the case with me. I've had SOME lifting, but that is from my nails impacting objects. I'm not used to having my nails this long, and it DOES take some getting used to. But my nails have been noticeably stronger, and this is a purchase I give 2 thumbs WAY up!

The deets on VitaGel in Recovery:

I purchased this off Amazon from Salon Supply Store. You can also find them on Ebay. I purchased it for $14.64 for a .5 fl oz (15ml) bottle. For a .3 fl oz (9ml) from Sally Beauty Suppy (the only place I can seem to find Gelish polish locally) was $20.95!!! Right now it's on sale for $15.95--and that's still outrageous to me!!! Salon Supply Store was priced great and shipped fast. I had my package in 3 business days. I also ordered a Gelish color in "A Girl's Gotta Glow" ($12.95 for a .5 fl oz bottle) and some Gelish foundation ($13.95 for a .5 fl oz bottle).

The strengthener is loaded with vitamins E, A and B5 and is specially designed to continuously release them throughout the 14 days of wear. Or in my case, longer--since I seem to have THE hardest time getting soak offs OFF! I wish I was kidding, but for some reason (doesn't matter the brand) I can't soak off the gel polish. I use 100% pure acetone and do the foil method with heat for 30-40 mins and it only takes the top layer off. The layer below is super sticky, but won't budge. So I've ended up filing it off my nails the last 2 times. I'm still trying some different techniques, and I'll also purchase a different acetone brand too. Right now, I'm using the Up and Up Target brand. So maybe that's the REAL issue. 

All in all, I recommend this product for those of us with weak nails who are looking for a longer solution nail strengthener that REALLY works.

Here is a demonstration on how to use the Recovery Vitagel:

As far as the file I used in the video, I still don't know the grit. Everything I've seen has a special name. "Cushion" or "Buffer" file. Unfortunately, the kit didn't specify a grit, or anything like that. Boo-urns.

I hope this information is helpful for you!

Until next time!

Ript Apparel, Fash Forward Boutique, Beautylish and Em Cosmetics HAUL!

I've been busy lately!!! Spending WAAAYYY too much money. HAHAHA. Ow well. As long as bills get paid, food is in our bellies and something is saved, I can get some pretties for myself every once in a while...or week...daily. 

Moving on...

Here is the YouTube video for the haul:

Here is the DL on everything I bought:

Ript Apparel

I LOVE Ript Apparel! They're a local company to me (so I get my shirts FAST ;P) and they do a different artistic/nerdy shirt every 24 hours. The design of the day is printed on multiple items. Their Tees are $10, hoodies are $38, toddler sizes are $12, 18x24 posters are $20, 24x32 posters are $40, 4 coasters are $25, iphone cases (4,4s and 5) are $18.

As of late, they have been having a double design on certain days. The deal is if you buy each design on a Tee, you save $1. Just me, but I don't see a huge deal in a dollar. But maybe someone might. 

I love Star Wars and enjoy the older Disney movies. I don't really like what Disney has become as of late. Miley Cyrus anyone? And why should a middle schoolers be concerned about dating boys? No bueno, Disney. Stick to Pixar, animated full length features, and leave the crappy TV shows to someone else. 

I'm scared to see what will become of the Star Wars legacy with Disney involved. But I'm trying to remain optimistic. Much like I am Ben Affleck being Batman in the next Superman movie... *sigh* I'd better move on before I hop on the soap box...

Fash Forward Boutique

I don't like to buy anything clothes related off the internet (except tees--can't really go TOO wrong with tees) because I'm afraid of the sizing being off, or the colors being wrong. However, Mama Laughlin and Skinny Meg have REALLY good taste in clothing when shopping online, and they've had nothing but awesome things to say about Kiki La'Rue and Fash Forward Boutique. Well one day I saw this shirt on Kiki La'Rue's instagram and I INSTANTLY fell in love with this shirt. But I couldn't afford it at the time. When I was finally able to afford it, my size was no longer in stock. While I'm confident about losing weight, I didn't want to buy a small JUST yet. Well a few weeks ago, I saw that Fash Forward Boutique had THE shirt! I went to their page and there it was! In my size and everything. SOLD! I've noticed that Kiki La'Rue and Fash Forward have a lot of the same items. Some items are different though. 

The shirt and shipping all together was $32.55. Pretty decent for a cute shirt like this! It also arrived pretty quickly. I am a satisfied customer, and will DEFINITELY be returning for more! Go check them out, and be sure to tell them I sent you! 

Beautylish

One of the YouTube gurus I subscribe to recommended that you create a Beautylish account as it's a great community of people who are professionals, beginners, inbetween-ers all coming together to enjoy all things beauty! Here is where you can find my Beautylish profile. There's not much on there, but I haven't had a chance to fully explore. 

They also have their own boutique where they sell makeup. They sell name brands, too. As well as some brands I've never heard of. So when you join, you get a $10 credit towards anything in their boutique! FREE MONEY!!! 

So I picked an Inglot eyeshadow, and a pretty red bow ring/palette. The ring was $10 (FA-REE!) and the eyeshadow was $6. Shipping was only $5---FOR 2ND DAY AIR FEDEX!!! WOW! I will definately be buying for the Beautylish boutique again. I'll also probably play on Beautylish for the entirety of the road trip I'll be taking next weekend. I can fill my profile with everything I like!

Swatch of the Inglot eyeshadow:

Em Cosmetics

When I first got into makeup, I started to watch a lot of YouTube. I was never into YouTube before then, but I sure as hell am now! One of the first people I subscribed to was Michelle Phan. She most certainly has come a long way. I'll admit I enjoy a lot of her older videos more than her newer ones. Seems like she's so super busy now with all of these companies that she started, etc. One of her endeavors was her own cosmetics line called "em cosmetics". This just recently launched, and their first deal was "Get started with em", which consisted of a lipstick, an eyeliner and a deluxe sample of one of the Life palettes for $27.50.

Normally the eyeliner is $20 and the lipstick is $16.50. They're not selling deluxe samples, but it shows that it would have been $7, according to my order history on their website.  So as you can see, it was a GREAT deal! I have to say though, I'm disappointing in the color of the lipstick. While is BOLD and gorgeous--It's just NOT for me. What I wanted, is what was on the website. Noooooot what I got. 

Image from emcosmetics.com
Don't Tell Mom color shown on website

Please excuse the horrid lip job. I didn't use liner. And I had chapstick on.
#beauty faux paux

I've used the eyeliner a few times and I really like it. Makes my eyes POP. As far as the deluxe sample of the palette goes, I haven't had a chance to play with it too much. But my first impression? Meh. It's ok. The taupe brown and blue are pigmented well, but the purple is kind of chalky and the lip color is more of a balm/gloss. Maybe it's supposed to be that way? But I'll do a look with it and see how I feel about it then. I'd probably want to try a few more products before I say anything about value. As it stands, I'm not sure that the retail pricing is really worth it. $20 for an eyeliner? I like it and all, but I don't think it's a $20 eyeliner. $12 maybe, but not $20. 

I totally sound like a negative Nancy right now, too! HAHAHA! Not trying to be. Just being honest. I would want people to be honest with me if I had a brand I was selling. How else can you improve, right? I'm not saying it's HORRID either. Just--Meh. 

Here are some swatches I did of the products I purchased:

R: Inglot shadow L: Turquoise liner

Deluxe Sample: Love Life R toL
Pupplies and Kitties, Springtime, Teal Rain, Melon

Top L to R: Don't Tell Mom Lip color, puppies and kitties, springtime, melon
Bottom L to R: Inglot shadow, turquoise liner, teal rain

I hope this information is helpful!

Until next time!

As summer is drawing to a close...

It's been a long and interesting summer.

It almost seemed too short. It's time to get back to the ol' grind.

So here's a little of what's been going on:

Over the summer, I've acquired a lot of new beauty products. Some I love. Some not so much. I plan on "raving" and "ranting" about my favorites and the absolute horrible ones. I'm also thinking of doing a collective summer haul video.

My "recording studio" (not even close) is under construction. I'm working on better lighting and getting a desk and chair. Because sitting on the floor is uncomfortable. Trisha Paytas--I don't know HOW you do it. Hahaha. I've also been looking into a better camera, or better apps and a tri-pod to better utilize my iPhone 5. Work. In. Progress.

I've been getting into nail art as well. I purchased a SensatioNail gel starter kit, and haven't gone back to regular polish since. I'll mostly use the polishes I have for my toes, or nail art designs over the gel. Pretty versatile. I'm also learning to make acrylic 3D nail art.

I'm working on some designs for the blog. I have a friend who does web design and I'll be getting with them on how to implement some changes I want to make here.

While I fell off the fitness bandwagon, I'm still maintaining a weight of 174-176, depending on the day. Now that K is gone, I'll be hitting the gym after work to get back on track. I also got a bike! I nice folder bike. I'll have more details about that later.

I cut my hair shorter.

We got a kitten! She's a little devil. Her name is Michonne.

I've also been playing my XBox a lot more. I've REALLY been into Halo. Master Chief is awesome. He also happens to be the morning radio DJ on the station I listen to. Amazing, right!? MASTER CHIEF IN THE MORNINGS. Seriously though, his name is Steve Downes--for those who DON'T know about Halo. I'm admittedly, not very good at FPS type games, however, I've been getting better day by day. I've been practicing with COD Black OPS bots, and am about to graduate to Battlefield 3 online. Yikes. I'm scuurrred!

The hubs and I pre-ordered the XBox One. I can't wait to go get it! They're supposed to have a huge release party, give out all kinds of SWAG, etc. The features they're offering for the XBox One just fit our lifestyle. I'm looking forward to have everything accessible through ONE box!

I have to say I'm pretty impressed with what Microsoft is doing these days. The hubs purchased the Nokia Lumia 920 and it's pretty nice. Sturdy phone, smooth OS. I have a couple of complaints about it, but I have complaints about my iPhone too and it's still not nearly as many as I do for Android phones. Windows 8 is nice too. I like the interface, and how you can use the phone like OS or switch the a "normal" desktop version for those not familiar with how the new interface works. Again, I'll a more detailed review type post for stuff like this later on.

Here are some pictures of happenings from this summer:

What a sucker. He did NOT want a new cat. But he named her and does this...

The girls at the 1st Division Museum @ Cantigny Park

Climbin' on tanks. Kids love this shit!

"Fire!" - K

K finally got her ears pierced!

I got a shitty haircut!

Gabey and Michonne SOMETIMES get along. But they're not trying to kill each other, so we're cool.

K is excited to go to Santa's Village!

J got more than she bargained for.

What a silly head. 

What you can't see is our fat asses squeezed into a tiny ride...

                              

Pony ride!

                               

More ponies!

J exploring at Santa's Village

I got my hair fixed and a LOT shorter!

K's last day. I miss her terribly...

                                               

So that was my summer! I'm also taking requests for videos! Do you want to see a makeup tutorial, recreation, a nail design for a special occasion??? Email me and let me know!

April Ipsy Bag review, May Ipsy Bag 1st impressions, and Hauls!

Hey guys!

If you haven't seen it already, I've posted 2 new videos to my YouTube channel. The first one is the April Ipsy bag review and the May Ipsy bag first impressions.

I really LOOOOOOVE the Ipsy bags. I've been a subscriber since they started in December of 2011. There HAVE been some duds, however, overall I've been really happy with their goodies. Totes worth the $10 a month. If you're interested in getting subscribed CLICK HERE to sign up!! You have the option to pay monthly or yearly. I do it monthly. If you're already apart of Ipsy, come show my page some love! I'll be sure to love your page, too. 

I've been trying to get a makeup look put together for the May bag, but I've been super sick since Friday and my poor face is red and blotchy from blowing my nose all weekend long. So my poor nose and mouth are SUUUUPER chapped. Not a fun look to show the world. 

The other video I did was for a haul. I've been on a lip craze lately, so I've picked up quite a few lip products lately that I wanted to show off. I also picked up a few fitness products. One thing that gets me excited about fitness (besides the weight loss--duh) is the SWEET digs! Of course because I'm still in a bigger size, it makes it more difficult to get some of the cuteness.  All the more reason to keep going!!!
I won't tell you about the big ticket item--watch the video and see the amazing-ness of the Sephora purchase I made!!!!

I know my video quality isn't top notch. I'm working on a better set-up, and possibly getting a stand/tri-pod for my iPhone for higher quality videos. If you have any suggestions for iPhone accessories for filming, or decent film editing software (free) comment below and let me know!!

Depending on how I feel tomorrow, I'll probably end up filming my May Ipsy bag look. But we'll see. 

Next week I'll be doing a fitness post--mostly an update of how the month went, etc. 

If you have questions, comments, etc--comment below or email me! Don't forget to follow me. :)

KaBoom! 2013 and Mother's Day Weekend

I've had a real lazy couple of days. Just throwin' that out there. I'm not terribly concerned about it at this point as I'm about to bust out some squats while I'm writing this (booyah) and will hopefully be getting my OWN bike in the next coming weeks. Yay! Hello riding to and from work everyday! I'd like to be a runner, but my ankle just isn't having that right now. Someday, I'll get there. But for now, I'm gonna BIIIIIIIKE.

This weekend was eventful. On Saturday I headed to the south side of Chicago to help build a playground for a school that has never had a playground. I hitched a ride with a co-worker and headed down there at 7am... on a Saturday. Ugh. BUT it was totally worth it. Even though I didn't stay the whole time, I had a lot of fun. I got to work with parents and teachers of the school and it was really rewarding to see how happy they were. I only wish I could have stayed long enough to see the kids faces once it was done. As odd as it sounds, I wanted to help with the mulch (there was a LOT) but there was a TON of people helping with mulch, most of which were standing on top of the pile waiting for people to come back for more mulch. So I ended up hooking up with another co-worker and helped assemble some benches. The rest of my Saturday was spent being a veggie. 

KaBoom 2013

Mother's Day was relaxing too. We were supposed to get up early to go to a gun show... buuuut I sorta, kinda, maybe, slept in. Hey, I'm entitled to sleep in damnit! Work is crazy, takes up 85% of my week and since I had to get up early on Saturday, my body decided it was going to sleep in. So we went and got my mother in law a planter of purple flowers and a card. I already got my card on Friday since my 2 year old is impatient and gave it to me as soon as I got in the car. Still cute though. While the munchkin was napping, the hubs, myself and his brother headed to Ikea to pick up some display cases for John's legos. Don't hate on grown men having legos! I still play with legos too. Moving on-- I'm an Ikea-a-holic. If I was rich, my whole house with be nothing but Ikea furniture. With the exception of my blue Lazy Boy and my grandmother's china hutch. I could spend hours in Ikea JUST getting decorating ideas. I've even started a Pinterest board JUST for Ikea.

So horse IS on the menu.

So after Ikea, we went back to the 'rents and had steak for dinner--nom nom nom-- then went back home to get ready for the week. While getting things ready, I decided to take my measurements since I hadn't in about a month. Here are my measurements:

April 4th:
38- chest above bust
41- bust
38- waist
40- biggest part of "gut"
44- hips
25- left mid thigh
15.5- left calf
13.4- right upper arm

May 11th
37.5- chest above bust
39- bust
35- waist
39- biggest part of "gut"
41- hips
23- left mid thigh
15- left calf
13.5- right upper arm

That's a 12" loss! AAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNDDDD I woke up to this today:

#progress. 1/2 way to 1st BIG goal!

Narcissistic moment in 3...2...1...

I'm so proud of myself. I'm really doing this. This isn't just another go balls to the wall for a week or two. I've been doing this for over 2 months now, and I have a lot to show for it. It would be so stupid of me to turn back now. I just have to keep pushing. I've made LIFESTYLE changes, and will continue to make them as I progress. My portions are smaller, and because of that, I eat less for my bigger meals. Now when I go to Chip Chip (commonly known as Chipotle') it's like getting a 2 for 1 meal!

OH and guacamole!!! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE?!?!?! I'm seriously an addict. It's my banana replacement. I HATE bananas and avocados are a great source for potassium which is supposed to help recovery from hard workouts. So I'll now be buying avocados for snacks. 

I haven't been hitting the gym as much as I'd like to. To be honest, I've been super stressed with work. Ever since I fired my (ex) friend, the phones have been too crazy for me to even TRY to eat lunch at my desk. I would usually eat lunch at my desk AFTER I hit the gym. But I have 2 new people I'm trying to get on the phones, and once they're up and going, I'll head back to the gym to do more strength training. For now, I'll continue to bike and do squats. Maybe some push-ups. Maybe. 

My hubs said he's going to have to get me pepper-spray since the last 2 out of 3 times I've ridden home, I've almost gotten into a fight with some a-hole being a douche at the fact that I'm riding a bicycle. I just don't understand why people have to run their mouth about people on motorcycles and bicycles. It's ridiculous  I don't even ride on the street because I don't want to get hit. 

So my next post will be about the May Ipsy bag reveal and April Ipsy bag review--which will be a video review as well. I'll also go over my "Day and Night" nails too. Since I just got my May Ipsy bag today, I'll hopefully be doing the video for it tomorrow and have it up by the end of the week.

Day and Night Nails

Time for bed >.< zZzZzZz

Want to know more about Ipsy? Want an Ipsy bag? Click HERE for more information!

Personal Victory

Check out Skinny Meg's Blog! 

This weight-loss journey has been a long and bumpy road. But I'm seeing and feeling results. It drives me and keeps me going

Last year, I had made a goal to ride a bike to work. I failed miserably. When I rode from my in-laws to my condo, I was miserable. It was less than a mile and I was wiped. I gave up on trying to ride to work and just started riding around the neighborhood. That didn't last long either. I quickly became discouraged about not being able to ride to work and gave up after a few tries.

Since I've been doing some spinning at work, and consistently working out I decided I'd give it another try. So I went to Target and got some some new workout capris (haul coming via video!) a new water bottle and got together with my bestie. My husband purchased a Dahon folding bike a few weeks ago and threw out his piece of crap bike and the bestie went out and bought himself a new bike too.

So I hopped on the husband's Dahon and the bestie and I headed to my work. And to my surprise, it wasn't completely exhausting. I actually thoroughly enjoyed it. I had expected to get to work and have to take a long break before heading back, or possibly needing the husband to come and pick me up. But when I got there, I was greeted with this breathtaking view:

Pond behind my work

I could have turned right around and headed home, but I decided to stick around and enjoy the view. We managed to watch 5 deer cross the pond as well as a few beavers swimming in the water and some fish jumping out of the water. It was a nice break from the hustle of life. After a few minuets, we hoped back on the bikes and headed home. I wasn't sore or tired. I felt great! I didn't really feel anything until the next day.

Bike Beasts

I have some crap-tacular shoes, to say the least. And a bum ankle to go right along with it. So combine the two after a nearly 8 mile bike ride and an entire afternoon at Brookfield Zoo on my feet nearly the whole time make for a very sore me. I was hobbling by the end of the day. Not. Fun. The trip to the zoo was frustrating on top of that. I don't understand why in the world a-holes with $2,000+ cameras go to the zoo to take a million photos and block any decent view for all the kids that are they to see the animals. I seriously had to restrain myself from going off people. Plus not to mention all the rude people pushing to get closer and they manage to shove right past you. You try to be polite and let people pass, and all they do is walk all over you. I was glad to leave. Maybe next time we'll go during a crappy weekday so I don't have to deal with all the jerk-asses.

The booger

Moving on!

I did ride the bike home tonight. I have to say, I'm slowing becoming obsessed with biking. I'd love to get up and ride to work, but alas, the husband is off work tomorrow and plans on riding most of the day. Ow well. I get my hour lunch back and can hit the gym and spin for a little bit.

On a more makeup related note: I showed extreme restraint tonight going to the store. I have recently fallen in love with Nude lipsticks and almost walked out the door with 3 more lipsticks. And I just purchased 2 over the weekend. >.< I have a problem. Hahaha. But I put them back and picked up what I ACTUALLY went to the store for. Pull-ups. Glamorous, no?

Cute booger

There is also an April Ipsy bag review coming soon. I may pair that with my Target haul--or I may do that separate  I haven't decided yet. I'm just building up the courage to get in from of the camera and say something. I'd like to do more videos. Maybe do some tutorials someday. One thing at a time. I'll start with hauls and reviews. I also plan on doing an "opening" of my ipsy bags, and maybe even a look using the products. Just some ideas I've been tossing around.

Anyone doing any challenges this month? I've been doing the 30 day squat challenge and so far so good. My legs feel SUPER tight all the time, but definitely not painful anymore. It's got me excited to do more strength training. I think next month I want to try something for my arms. Since I have almost NO upper body strength.

Well I'm running out of gas and drifting to sleep as I sit here trying to type this, complete billing all while listening to my bestie play some Minecraft. I'm jealous. 

The {not so} joys of being the boss...

One word of advise:

Never. Ever. Hire/recommend friends. Ever. 

2 months ago, I did a friend a favor and hired her to work on my team. Granted I didn't really hire her, merely recommended her and let my boss and the Talent Specialist do their job. They were blown away with her. I was stoked. Boy have things changed. 

At first things were great. She was helping out a lot, answering the phones, even if it was just to take messages. Training was crappy though. We were trying to staff more people because our phone calls were out of control for just 2 people. I couldn't get away from the phones, so I did what I could to train her, and have others help. I had to to the same thing with my now elite customer service specialist, and she is fabulous. A month goes by, and she's still struggling (A LOT), and I'm now noticing her phone demeanor is not the best. I was also approached by a couple of other managers about her behavior and some inappropriate comments. *ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?* So I had a meeting with her about it. Thought we cleared it up. 

Nope. 

She'd be ok for a day. Maybe two. Then get back to talking down to the customers. I really don't think that she knew that she was doing it. Either way, this just wasn't cutting it. I really think the final straw was when the CEO came and sat with us to make observations on how to better my team. *He's doing that for the whole company--wee!* Well the meeting we had afterwards was not pretty. He was petrified about how she was treating the customers and some of things she was saying. As if she were making things up. I had called her that night and told her things HAVE to change. I told her to talk to the customers as  if she were talking to my boss, or interviewing for a job. 

The next morning, she came in and was doing really well. Until the afternoon. She began to crack under pressure and started talking down the the customers again. So I made the decision to to the right thing. The right thing for her, the right thing for the company, and the right thing for my reputation as a newer manager. I took all of my documentation to my boss and made my recommendation. This just wasn't the job for her. She seems better suited to do something face to face, rather than phones. And that's ok! Most people aren't suited for the phones. Sometimes I hate the fact I'm so damn good on the phone. 

So Friday afternoon, I fired my first employee. Who was also my friend. I didn't do it alone, thankfully. Thanks to my boss for the support. It didn't make it ANY easier, but I don't know if I could have done it alone--especially because it was my first time firing ANYONE. 

I haven't talked to my friend since. I don't know if we're still friends. I want to give her space before I contact her as I know she's still upset. I had also made it perfectly clear from the start that business was business and the friendship is left at the door each day we walked into work. So, we'll see what happens when I contact her in a few days. 

On to less drab happenings! 

Last week was horrid for my workout routine. I had to have a root canal on Tuesday. I finally got that back effing tooth fixed. I've only had issues with it since October. And yes, I am in a battle with the dentist on $$ because personally I think it's their fault my tooth was jacked. I'll save that rant for another post. Something along the lines of "Why I hate the damn dentist"--Only better. 

I finally made it to the 170's! Woo! My goal is to come up with a better plan for the gym. It sucks only having an hour for lunch because I really only have about 40 minutes to work out as it takes me about 10 minutes to walk to the gym and get changed and another 10 to get ready to go back to work. My cardio is usually about 20-25 minutes, depending on what I do. I need to incorporate some weights into my routine again.  I feel... flabby. I think starting on Wednesday I'm going to do the squat challenge for May. Not gonna lie, I failed miserably on the plank challenge for April. So here's hoping squats turn out better for me. 

I refuse to let a few steps backward cause me to fall flat on my face and give up completely. And you shouldn't either!!! If you have a crappy eating day, OW WELL! Try again tomorrow! Focus and practice better self control. I had a HORRIBLE eating day on Saturday. I had 3-- count em THREE-- nutty buddy bars. Not individual bars... the whole damn package. UGH. But again, that's ok. I got my happy/flabby ass on that spin bike today and got BIZ-AY! And I'm going to do it again tomorrow too. 

Here are my goals for the month:
- Go to the gym every work day
- Do the May squat challenge
- Do more makeup schtuff *Reviews for April's Ipsy bag coming soon!*
- Be more active on the weekends (soccer, running, etc)

What are your goals for the month?? 

Till next time!

My reasons are my own...

***Sorry! It took a couple of days longer than I had anticipated. But it's done!!! Be looking for more from me!***


I've been struggling with my weight for a while. Ever since I had my first child and I had the pooch from the C-section, I've wanted to have a body again.

I can remember when I was younger, I used to hate my body because I didn't have boobs. I look at pictures of myself when I was younger--early high school-- and think to myself "Wow, was I an idiot not to see that I had a great body." But being that age, you're almost never going to have a good body image. 

Before, when I would "diet", it never lasted long. It would last a week, maybe 2, then I'd say "I'd rather be fat and happy, then skinny and miserable." My justification for eating like crap and not getting any physical activity. 

I would buy workout equipment, or video games for the Wii. Again, it would never last long. I'd use them for a day or two, then get caught up in something, or make excuses, or just be too damn tired to do anything. 

In 2010 when I had my 2nd child, my weight was about 200. I lost a good deal of it after having J, trying to breastfeed, my body re-adjusting, etc. Then my world turned upside down and my weight spiraled out of control as well as my life...

On December 21st, 2010, my mother passed away at the age of 47. It's really difficult for me to even type this as I still haven't truly mourned her death. Life always has a crappy way of getting in the way of things you should probably take care of...

My mom and I December 11th 2010

After my mom passed away, I was unemployed, a stay at home mom and super depressed. I lived off of Zebra Cakes and Coca-Cola. I should have been looking for a job, but was not interested in working at all. I just wanted to stay at home, eat Zebra Cakes, and watch TV. My weight went all the way back up to 203lbs. Looking back at some of the pictures, I felt so out of my skin. My clothes weren't fitting right. I had didn't have a long lean face anymore (and that's usually the last place I gain weight). I always wore baggy tees and baggy pants, didn't really take any care in my appearance, or take care of myself. Needless to say, I was an emotional mess, even if I didn't know it. 

My "little" brother and I- June 2011 at my heaviest

I got married in March of 2011. D and I had initially wanted to do it sooner, but with my mother's death, we pushed it back to a date when my dad could be in town so I could at least have some of my own family around. I had to wear a size 18 dress. While it was a great dress, I just felt ha-uuuuuge. Not really how I wanted to feel on my wedding day. Even if it was my 2nd. ;)

The hubs and I March 18th 2011

In September of 2011, I got my job working where I am now, and I slowly started to come out of my funk. To be honest, I just push down the feelings I have about my mother. I should probably talk to someone about that, but I'm not ready to at this point. Anyways, I really enjoyed my job and things started looking better for me. So I got back into the swing of things, and started to REALLY realize that I was on the heavy side.

The hubs and I- July 2012 P-Town "End of Year" party

That's when my makeup obsession started. I started selling Mary Kay, and getting into all things beauty related. Since then, I have acquired a LOT of makeup and makeup related products. It also got me thinking that I needed to take better care of myself. And thus the yo-yo dieting began again.

For about 2 weeks I did the smoothie/juice cleanse. It gave me a jump on losing weight as you saw in previous posts. But I eventually caved back into eating like crap and gained a bunch of the weight back and was back in the 190's. I was back to the "rather be fat and happy, than skinny and miserable" crap. UGH. I still didn't like the way I looked in the mirror--with our without clothes, I was tired all the time, and I just couldn't get motivated.

I can't believe I got down to 182 and blew it! >.<

It wasn't until I finally went in to see the doctor about being tired all the time, that things started to fall into place a little bit. My blood pressure was still high, and I hadn't been treating it. I was set up with a sleep study to see if I had any sleeping disorders (the hubs swears up and down that I'm a snoring maniac and probably have the startings of sleep apnea) and that was a pointless experience. I couldn't freakin sleep!!! I had all these wires with sticky crap all over my face and hair, I wasn't in MY bed, and I had the anxiety of knowing I was being watching. Needless to say, I'm pretty sure I never even made it to REM sleep. So of course the results came back as "nothing wrong". I got a new prescription for blood pressure medication and went on my way.

 It was about a month later, when I was running low on my meds, that I've decided I've had enough. I was tired of being tired, tired of being overweight, and tired of being unhealthy. At work, we just had our new gym open up a few weeks earlier and I decided it was time to start utilizing the tools that I had available FOR FREE.

I walked in the gym--and opted to start with the elliptical. I was familiar with it, low impact on my knees. I could do that! Yeah... I could barely do 10 minuets on the damn thing. I could generate about 60 something watts and my heartrate soared into the 170's-180's. I was a MESS! But I did 10 minuets. It was something for me. For someone who hadn't done anything remotely strenuous in a very, VERY long time. I also took up taking an AMAZ-A-BALLS multivitamin called "Alive- Women's Energy" as well as a DHA capsule for non-fish omega 3's. I've noticed a huge difference in my energy levels taking these and if I forget--holy crap I feel like... well... crap.

So after a couple of times hitting the gym, I started reading Mama Laughlin and Skinny Meg's blogs, keeping up with their Instagram's, Facebook's, and recently being introduced to Keek through them as well. I realized I need to add some weights to my routine. I started going to the gym during my lunch hour. Hopping on the elliptical first, then trying some free weights.

I'm proud to say that I can now done 20 minuets on the elliptical without stopping. I've also gone from 5lbs weights, to 7.5. Now I'm only able to do a set of about 10-20 reps (depending on what I'm doing) because I'm limited on time, but I'm still doing SOMETHING. My heart rate is also getting more difficult to get up to my target zone. when I first hopped on the elliptical, I was at my target heart rate within a few seconds. Today, it took me almost 2 minuets to get to it, and I couldn't really get it past 163-- and it was HARD to get it to that.

When I started about a month ago, I was 188ish lbs. I'm now down to 185. Not a whole lot, but at this point, I'm really more worried about getting healthy. I want my blood pressure to be lower, I want to have energy and stamina to do more with my kids. I want to go outside and play soccer with my kids. I figure the "skinny" part will come along with being healthy. 

I've been doing a monthly challenge for April---the 2 minuet plank challenge. So far so good. I even did my 45 second plank today. And today is 1 of my 2 "off" days. I don't work on the weekends, and I work out every work day, so I have Saturday and Sunday as my off days. Next week I'm going to start pushing myself a little harder. I may even look into doing my own personal spin class---since we have bikes in the gym too. I don't think I'm ready for the treadmill just yet. But I do see 5K's in my future *AHEM* Run For Your Lives...

I've come to the realization that THIS is IT! No more being super lazy anymore. I'm pushing myself every day at work to hit the gym---no matter what. I may wake up and feel like I may not make it, but I'll be damned if I'm not grabbing my bag and telling myself "You'd better get your ass in there and KICK IT!" I know that if I didn't, I'd totally regret it. Right now, I'm keeping holding myself accountable. I have a pseudo gym "buddy" but she hasn't joined me in the last 2 weeks. I've playfully chastised her, but I won't push her to go if she really doesn't want to go. She has to want to go to. 

I'm also doing baby steps. While I loved doing Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred, I also realized that I was hurting myself. I couldn't walk for almost 4 days after I did it. That's not how I will be able to make my changes. I'm making baby steps. And I do plan on going toe to toe with Jillian again soon. For now, I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing to work my way up slowly so I don't hurt myself again.

I also need to learn some different strength training moves, and get organized with them. That's one thing I'm horrible with--organization. Only on a personal level. Work is something totally different. I usually do some cardio then go from one move to the next, just on a whim. I feel like I could get more done if I went in with an ACTUAL agenda. So organization (in all aspects of my personal life) is a goal for me as well as getting healthy. 

Do I have an "ideal weight"? Sure--but I'm not hardcore focusing on that right now. I want to lower my blood pressure and no longer need medication. I want to have strength to go for a hike, or walk around for long periods of time, and go play outside with my kids. I want to be a better example for my kids. I want to be healthy enough to start trying for another baby. I want to live past the age of 47. 

Most of all....

I want to LIVE!

I approve of sweat sesh's!